Well, I couldn't resist, so I just snagged the deal. 2018 Cayman S, Guards Red, Black standard interior with leather package (not full leather), Sport Chrono, PASM, heated & ventilated seats, auto climate control, dynamic headlights, sport exhaust, 20" Carrera S wheels in glossy black. Total of 180 miles. Discounted 20% off MSRP.
Oil and filter change will be done prior to delivery, and will count as the first (free) scheduled service. As for the brake fluid and battery, I'll figure that out shortly.
Of course the car is under the stop-sale order but I'm sure that'll be resolved quickly.
And you want to know the crazy thing? This is going to be my wife's daily driver. Yes, she's going to be taking it to work every day, to Safeway, etc. I will use it once or twice a week as a commute car. It will be parked in our garage next to our lovely Night Blue 718 Boxster, because apparently one Porsche was not enough.
Clearly, I have lost all grip on reality.